Yet another reason why New Hampshire sucks

Yesterday, I reached the ripe old age of 21, and I had hoped to celebrate with a legal drink at my friendly neighborhood bar. Unfortunately, in the “live free or die” state, it is illegal to serve someone on their 21st birthday. This is supposed to inhibit binge drinking on that auspicious day, as the barkeep explained, but it fails to consider that a thirsty young man will have access to alcohol every day for the rest of his life. If I am capable of drinking myself to death on the birthday, why not any other day? Why should I be denied a celebratory beer, or twelve, if I so choose on this, my day of majority? The man can’t keep me down any longer, I’m now a fully fledged adult in the eyes of the law (unless I try to rent a car, but that’s another rant for another day).

My cherished home state of Vermont has no such restriction, but there are sadly no bars on that side of the river anywhere near my hometown.

To the state of New Hampshire, you can’t keep me down any longer! I will exercise my right to abuse my liver as I see fit, drive a motorcycle without a helmet, and dye margarine pink. This agression will not stand, I am drawing a line in the sand. The Freestaters can have NH, I’ll remain a Green Mountain Boy ’till the day I die.